Just one of those Days!!

Over the last week.. I have been up and down.. 

I am glad that I am having more good days than bad.. I thought I was about to loose hope in all things...

For one I am still having issues with life, friends, and work...

I cut all ties with those two that were being messy... I had to delete and erase them from my life...

So in due time they will be a faded memory.. I can't deal with Dikthrust women.. 

I had just last night I had to also SHOW someone the ROLE they wanted to play in my life. They cheated on me (well never left their last) then have the nerve to still try and treat me like a GIrLFrienD.. It has gotten to the point I had to break it down.. I was trying to hard not too.. I value the friendship but since she is having a hard time separating that friendship from what we had in the past.. It no longer exist either.. Yea I am dropping these ishes like flies.. 

I am still learning.. I have always be the one that suffers in all this.. I got to STOP dealing with these folks.. 

I just wonder when I am dead and gone, WHAT WILL I BE REMEMBERED FOR… Everyone always tell me how wonderful of a person I am.. How my smile brightens everyone up… So if this was the case… Why I sometimes feels I am not noticed or my feelings doesn't matter..

I hate when the very person that has hurt me and broken me, tells me… “You hurt my feelings!” I don’t get it neither do I can  process the thought. I hurt your, feelings?   To even hear those words rubbed me the wrong way and changed my whole MOOD…

I don't know what people expect from me.. I used to try and figure it out.. Now I know there is no way.. I plan on stop trying. I let things and people get under my skin to quickly and to often.. I know now why my blood pressure stays on the high side. 

We been having one of those crazy weather patterns lately.. Yesterday we had ice and freezing rain.. Today it is warmer and the sun is out.. LOL  It's just nuts.. I guess it is going right along with the way I am feeling.. Sometimes Sunny and Sometimes Gloomy.. 

I am going to go and finish updating my site.. That black and white was driving me coo coo.. 

I love this...

I think this is so cute.. Thanks to my friend over there @Fancy Face Kreations

I have a beautiful and wonderful Banner... 

:)

Disappearing Acts!!

Have you ever want to fade to BLACK..? The re-appear as something or someone else.. I know that I am not the only chicka with problems.. It just seems like I can not get out of my problems.. I have no one I can count on for my woes.. I have nothing even keeping me sane..

Its like I have cut back on a lot.. I have even tried to budget the best way I know how.. I WORK so hard.. This is what kills me.. I give my job 37-40 hours a week and I am STILL drowning.. I don't know what to do.. 

I am tired of crying myself to sleep.. I am tired of putting on my fake smile.. What is a girl to do.? I just want to fade to black and disappear..  It looks like my isolation is gonna happen once again. :(

I was trying SO HARD not to get in that place.. I wanted this year to be so much better.. Now, look it is starting off on the wrong foot.. So sad , So sad.. 

I think that I am just gonna give up.. I am tired of this fight.. So now I am going to be emotionless.. I am NUMB to everything around me.. There is no more fight in me. Why try and be better when we are still going to be at our worst..

Well I am about to do what I always do when I get down and depressed... Isolate and Sleep.. Until next time.. Be Blessed..

Happy New Years!!

So far 2013 is looking up!!

I didn't want to bring it in at a club but I did.. I am glad too.. I got to see 3D in person.. Yes K. Michelle was at a club for the New Years Eve party.. I enjoyed it very much..

As you can tell in this dark grainy picture...

Since she is my sister's favorite person in the world.. I think my sister had an awesome night too.. 

Look at how she is cheesing.. LOL 

My cousin also got to get on stage and sing next to K.. 

So in such amazement.. 2013 is going to bring us all joy and happiness.. I just know it..

Happy New Year everyone!!!!!!!!!