My Thoughts of Today.. Distilled Cow Urine

I don't knock anyone's belief in the other countries. I do know it is some stuff I will not even step too. First of all people drinking raw cow milk. I tell you I got to go to a farm once and since then I really don't care for milk at all. It was yellow and pusy. So the little milk I do get is 1% to 2% milk. Water has better benefits for me..

I was watching the news today and they were talking about the benefits of Distilled Cow Urine. I like to puked right there on the spot. Hell I don't like Golden Showers, so I know that crap aint going into my mouth. You remember when you were little your parents would tell you to put your pee on your face to clear up a rash. That was even gross, and never wouldn't let my mother do me like that.

Well they are saying that Distilled Cow Urine would help people with diabetes. The enzymes in the urine has anti diabetes properties. WHAT IN THE HELL? They tested it on lab rats.. I know I hate rats but even that is cruel in my opinion.

This is what the Indian culture is stating and they praise the cow over there. Where here we eat them. They say "Cow, as Kamdhenu is provider of all happiness “matrah sarva bhutanam, gavah sarv sukh prada”. Meaning cow being mother of all living entities gives all pleasures to everyone."

To get more on this check out this website... Cow Urine Manual . I tell you it seems legit.. I just not the one that is going to try this.

My Thoughts of Today... Oprah

I am one of those women who loves Oprah... I admire everything this woman does. I am just at the point to where I am upset with her. You know I started watching Oprah when she was Big Oprah. I even watched her when she was Little Oprah. So her weight is not my issues with her.

I see that she is making comments about being embarrassed that she gain some weight back. She don't like the way she let herself go. I am like huh? How can the Queen of Daytime and a Rich Bytch be embarrassed?

For one I think Oprah has a beautiful shape on her. Heck I would go crazy if I had her thighs, legs, and booty.. hehehhee... We as women do get upset when we gain weight. I think Oprah problem is the fact that she don't know how to dress her weight. Of course you gonna look humongous when you wear a poofy skirt or dress.

She is saying that she has an addiction to food. Well Oprah, I do too.. I love to cook and eat, yet I will never walk in life feeling embarrassed about my weight. I do get upset though. Sometimes I go on a diet just to remain in my clothes. I just don't think I would be all that mad at myself. Weight will never change the person you are.

It took me awhile to realize that. I used to be ashamed to go out of the house when I weighted over 200lbs. When I found out I was gaining more weight just because I was depressed.. I did something about it...

No matter what size you become Oprah.. I still love ya... Heck I just wish I look as good as you once I reach your age.. I hope that in time you will stop being so hard on yourself. Cause I still feel like you are a hottie... A Beautiful Black Woman with style, grace, and intelligence....

My Thoughts of Today.. Anthony Hamilton

Anthony Hamilton is one of my favorite Soul Singers of my time. His passion, voice, lyrics, and delivery makes my day. I tend to listen to him everyday.

So with his new album coming out, I had to do my dedication to this man. He is my idol next to Mary J. Blige.

He was born in my second home Charlotte North Carolina in 1971. You can hear his southern roots in all of his music. I hate that he don't get more recognition.

I have a long list of favorites from this man.. Charlene, I am a Mess, Do you Feel Me, and Comin' from where I come from... He also made a few guest appearances with other artist. My favorite one to date is the one with Keyshia Cole, Losing You.

When he first came on the scene with Nappy Roots, I was like who is that guy.. I have been hooked on him since. I got to see him in concert back in 2003. It was at a local night club here in Greenville. It was one of the best nights of my life.





Anthony Hamilton is the man.. If I ever get married, I want him to sing..

My Thoughts of Today.. Drug Testing..

I do believe before you get hired you should be drug tested. If I had my own business, it would be a requirement.

What I don't believe in waiting until someone calls or goes to the manager and state that they think someone is strung out on drugs.

I have seen people who are able to work very well on drugs. I just think it should not become an issue in the workplace. It should be done in private before hired.

See once you allow a person to work there and get to know everyone else. It becomes the workplace issue. That's when you hear people talking about the other person and what not.

I don't care for gossip and I am a believer of 2nd chances. So if you didn't allow the person to be drug tested before you hired them. Don't do it in the middle of their years on the job. The best thing for you to do is just to fire them, because they are not able to do their job.

It's hard enough dealing with life issues. I know some people get high at some point in their lives. I just don't believe a Crack Head would even be on a job. I just wish my job will talk to the drunks that work there.

My Thoughts of Today....McNugget Lovin'?

Oh my Gosh.. I think this is the most stupid commercial right now. I don't even like McDonald's Chicken Nuggets. I am more of the Chik' Flia' girl..

When seeing this commercial I think back when my ex was raiding McDonalds. You remember back when you could get 20 piece for 3.00? Well this was back around 96 or 97. My ex would tell them his nuggets was hard. So they would give him another 20 free of charge. So every time they saw him coming they would fry a fresh batch just for his punk butt.

My cousin says it makes her want to go out and buy her some. My mother even likes the stupid commercial. I just don't get it. I for one will never go out in the cold and raining weather just for a dern 10 piece. It aint that much chicken in the world that would. Now I might go out for a steak and a few shots of Tequila. It will never be for no dern nuggets.

What makes it even more stupid is the fact his butt is begging for a dern nugget. I can see me and MC fussing over dern cheese sauce from the Mexican Resturant.. Now that is some good shyt.. LOL

I am just glad the only time I ever see the commercial is when I am watching Keyshia Cole "The way it is". I know it is trying to target Black people.

I tell you.. I need to make a commercial for Jamaican Mango and Lime products.. I tell you now that is a good brand.

My Thoughts of Today....HIV/AIDS

Today is World AIDS Day. This has touched my life in so many ways. I have family members living with the disease. I had members to also die from it. It hurts me to see them hurt the way that they do. I hurts me to see their friends and family turn their back on them also.

It is something that we can prevent. If you know your status that is the first step. Educating people and children on the dangers of unprotected sex. It is not about getting pregnant and gonorrhea anymore. Setting up more programs in the community. Especially now in the Black Community. Black women are the high in the statics of having the virus.

You can love someone with all your heart. You can even trust them to the point where you feel safe. Well me I feel even safer if I know their status. It is nothing against them. It is more of us being there for one another. It never and insult but a concern.

So when you meet someone new and you one day want to become intimate with them. Ask them about their status. If they tell you that they don't know, encourage them to get tested. You are not only saving your life but theirs. You will come out being the bigger person.

Protect yourself and other.. Learn, teach, and provide people you know with the knowledge. People living with HIV/AIDS are human, treat them as such. Don't look down on them. AIDS is like a cancer one day (hopefully) we will find a cure.

My Thoughts of Today... The End of the World

I was having a conversation with one of my Co Workers the other day at work. They were talking about the end of the world.

I am one of those people who do not believe in the end of the World. I believe that life comes and goes in different forms. So it would be just the end of the world as we see it.

Like the Dinosaurs ruled the earth at one point. Then when they saw one touch of human life, they began to die off.

Now that we are humans on this earth, it is going to be something else that is going to take our place. I don't know when and I frankly don't really care.

I understand the point that they were talking about. It was the global warming and all this nuclear stuff might be the cause of our distinction. Then it was the subject about the one currency. They feels that Obama is going to be a dictator. I tell you these backwoods people that I work with. (SMH)

Nostradamus predicted a lot of things. I am just not into all that. I am alive through God's Will. It is part of life. We live and we die. Why sit here and wait on it? Live you life...

Do you believe the end of the world is near? How do you think it is going to happen?

My Thoughts of Today....Back Spasms...

I am sorry that I haven't been here for awhile. I think it has been about 3 to 4 days. The reason being is those dern back spasms returned it's ugly head again.

I been having these things since 1997, and it comes and goes. The last time was back about a year ago. It started when I was brushing my teeth. It lasted for about a day or so.

I know my body is stressed right now because of working so much during the holidays. So on Saturday they started. This time is worst than the last. It is still going on right now.

I would love to thank.. KIWIES... She went online while I couldn't and checked on this for me. I am doing a little better thanks to her. I still didn't go to the doctor because, I am just tired of going.

I have to return back to work tomorrow. I even found my great grandfathers cane to help me walk. So I feel like a old woman..

My thought of Today... Twins

My thought of today is kinda odd just because I never seen it before. It was last night the first time ever for me.

There were two identical twins to come into my store. They were nice and cute. They were around 18 years of age.

When you look at them you wouldn't right off think what I am about to say. They were both Gay. I tell you I know that twins have a lot in common and what not. I just never knew they could have both been gay. So one of my co workers asked them how old they were. They came out and say... We are 18 and yes we are gay. I stood there and looked dazed.

I am by all means not saying anything is wrong with that. I support gay rights. I support anyone in the LBGT community. You know I do because I tend to talk about it a lot. I am just wondering how their family is dealing with it.

One of my co workers said he would be upset if both of his boys were gay. He was like one of them had to come out right. I didn't like his other comments and I will not say them.
So when a person says that twins have a lot of similar characteristics, you can say that those two young men have a lot...

My Thoughts of Today... Hearing those words..

It might just be a woman thing. I can be over reacting. I do know it would be nice to hear the words "You Are Beautiful" sometimes.

I know that I am not a bad looking woman. I know that my personality stands out more than anything else.

I just feel if you have been with a person for a long period of time, they should say it sometimes. You give a compliment. Like when you first started dating. You go out and they say WOW you're beautiful.
Why is it that the longer you are with someone all those compliments seem to go down the drain?

I know for one I feel better when I hear those words from the person I love. We have a lot of competition out here. There are more women in this world than they are available men. So when we have a significant other, we want to make sure we can keep them.
Just a few simple words to make someones day. So I say everyone take the time out to tell the people you love how good they look. They might already know they are good looking, but give a freakin complement once in awhile. It would even be better if you told a stranger.

You never know how a person is feeling that day. It would sure cheer them up. I know it works for me.

My Thought of Today.. Ghetto

ghet·to (gt)n. pl. ghet·tos or ghet·toes

1. A section of a city occupied by a minority group who live there especially because of social, economic, or legal pressure.

2. An often walled quarter in a European city to which Jews were restricted beginning in the Middle Ages.

3. Something that resembles the restriction or isolation of a city ghetto.


I just don't get it. Why must people act this way? It has became the norm in some parts. I know that it is always a time and a place to act a certain way. So why is it now so hip to be Ghetto fabulous?

Someone please let me know...

My Thought of Today... The Old Me...

Thanks to my BFF I was able to stumble across my old blog. The site has been since taken down but I found some of my old post. It was back in 2001-2004. It was right before I found my MC. I could not believe I wrote some of these things. I was still posting stuff on Tupac and about all the men in my life. I tell ya PITIFUL. I am glad I finally woke up. All and all I still go through some of those things.

Here was my shout out page.....

First of all I would like to give a shout out to my Parents.I know that I wasn't the perfect child but I never direspected neither one of you.

Woaquina, my best friend since 5th grade. We have had some good and bad times. We overcame it all. Congratulations on the New Addition to the family
Zanya, you to best friend since 5th grade. I'm always here for you. I'll continue to pray for you.
Contessa, Girl I don't know what to do with out you. Good Luck on your new life in the Ft. Laud.
Lawona, my dawg for life..even thought we don't get to talk much. Congrats on the new Marriage.
Brian, I love you. You are the male friend that I have so much respect for. You have been there for me when no one else was able to be.I wish the best for you and your wife.. "I Love you"
Nang, You know how I feel.. Words will never express the love and honor you have given me over the past 16 years. I can say that the love we have for each other will never change. Even though we both are moving on in our lives. I'm glad that we can still be friends.. Yes I will always be yours.
*New Man* Coop, I am glad that we became what we became. I love your keeping it real attitude. You have made me feel special in so many ways I can't name them all. You are a young man that is really keeping me on my toes. Again, I am glad and I thank you from every little piece that is in my heart.

My friends that I consider family

Mioko, Thanks for all you have done.. I value your friendship, your advice, and your humor. You are my guardian angel.
Mz_Ryder, Girl you are a stone cold trip.. We are two of a kind. I will consider you my sistah for life.
Solo_909,This too shall pass.. You are a good man in hiding.. Things in your life will get better. See what I tell ya, great things come to thos who wait.

Toshi, you are my homie, and a very good friend. I wish the best for you and keep on with the keep on. I love ya sis...LOL
Shunna, my cousin, my sistah, and my partner in crime, there is nothing to say but I LOVE YA... Your da best.. Baby, Baby, Baby we are having a Baby... I will be a auntie...
Lrg,Red,BigdaddyChris,ttyeman(where in the heck are you?),DOOLOW,MsBlacKat,and the rest of the best..

My online Buddies
Brolove, Man you are the greatest.. If it wasn't you I wouldn't know anything on the net. I wish the best for you. I also can't wait until your Nubian Mindz start to shine.
MrDelite, You were the 1st person that I talked to on the net.. You to help me learn what html and website was. Even though you are being a butt at the present time..Total butt....(singing welcome back like mase..) lol
Ebnycream, Sapphire_Dreams, Mammadramma21(Meechelle where are ya?), Gusshawk, and my old WBS family.. I wish I knew where some of you all were. But where ever you all are I wish you all the best..
Remember Teelee loves you all.. I will be looking around the net for you.


Then I got to see some of my old pictures... Then Boom some of my old post...

It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday....

Well this past weekend had it's ups and downs. I meet a person from my group over the weekend. We all went out to eat and had a grand ole time. I really enjoyed sitting around talking to people. I can be a hoot though at times.

Well I also went and meet MC at his house. We had a wonderful time. He was a pure gentleman up until yesterday afternoon. I think that our so called something is ove with. It hurts to say goodbye to him. I just feel that he wanted to let go because he was scared. We are having feeling conflicts. We both care a great deal for each other. Its just he dosent want a relationship. We talk all the time, we do things together, and we have great intimate momments. Its just he feels at this time relationship isnt what is best for us. He said that I am feeling him to much. I am not taking the time to really get our life together. I dont understand what is his problem. I am good to him, and heck he is good to me. He said we need to go back to having just a friendship. How do you do that? Me and him been friends for close to a year. We been intimate for about 3 months. Didnt people always friends make the best lovers. I guess not! Cause it didnt work for me like that. I want to know how to let go?

Trust, honest, and full of shyt....

I am about tired of this shyt again. I trust people to damn much. I dont know why, but I do. I think I need to make another blog( toshi have you found out how to do it yet). I mean I need a private blog to where I could really vent. This past weekend was kool. Friday night, I was bummed out, cause I went to Shuams on thursday. Sat night was kool, the black chippendales. They arent as good as they used to be. I mean when they had Dancing Machine, it was the bomb.

You know, I dont want another single soul, to say I love you... I mean the next time someone says that to me, I will knock the living hell out of them.. I know thats cruical; just being honest. I have gotten to the point of letting my feelings show. I mean now, I aint holding anything back. You will know how I feel upfront. Good or bad ya gonna know it. I am also feeling the wrath of the triffling women again. The old hag is at it again, thats all I am gonna say on that.

Me and nang are doing well again, I am just so proud of that man.

Who you calling a whore?

Ya know it has gotten to the point where other females take stuff to the extreme. As the ones that knows me very well, knows that majority of my friends are male. They are males that I for one dont sleep with. I aint saying I am a but, cant a girl have make friends. Someone came to me today, telling me I need to stop acting like that. I was like acting like what. They told me I talk to so many guys people think that I am a (whore).. Well, for one I aint. Yes I am a sexual person, and I like to get pleased. I dont consider myself as a loosey goosie. I love to have fun, chill, and meet people. The person who came to me with this is a quiet dont get out of the house person. Sometimes I think it is all envy.

I went to Shuams last night, I had a god time. I saw some people there I havent seen in ages.

I also meet my friend there. The one I met last friday night at tiki bobs.

Can you believe that I didnt drink either. For some odd reason I didnt want too. I knew I had to ve at work at 7am, but that used to have not bother me.

All in all I am glad that I went..

The return of 5 eyes!!!!!!!!!!!!

This man, gets on my ever lasting nerve. How about this fool called me, not once but 5 times yesterday. Begging me to come and see him. He even asked to pick me up.

The name of My site was Love, Life, and Pain. Yea I am a big Mary J Blige fan. The slogan was Dymonds are Precious and so is Mahogany.

I tell you some of the stuff I wrote.. I am just a blogging fool.. lol

My Thoughts of Today.. Bad Attitudes....

I know that I am a moody person. I know that at times I can go off on a person. Yet the only time I do that is when they piss me off.

The Holiday season is coming up and I hate retail. I really hate retail, you hear me.

I am a person who works with the public and I tell you the public is not nice. I hate the fact that I have to grin and bare when I get those rude, hateful, immature MFS.

I made a vow to treat people the way I want to be treated. I thought that was a golden rule. Well the people that come into my store don't follow the same rules that I do. They are harsh people.

I know that at this present time people are under a lot of stress. I have one thing to say.. If you weren't so hateful you wouldn't be going through a rough time. Be nice, Be kind, listen to the next person. Always wear a smile on your face even if it hurts.. Treat people with kindness and respect.

If you can not follow those simple rules.. You Suck...

My Thoughts of Today.. Men

I love them Lord knows I do. I just can't get a grip on how SOME of them act. I been trying to figure them out all my life. I guess it goes both ways. I do know I try not to keep them in the guessing field long. I let them know how and why I act the way I do. So what is so hard for them to do the same for me.

I think it started back with my father. He is a non emotional man. He will never show you his weaknesses. He also is not verbal with anything that he has qualms about. Now if he is mad and pissed at you, that is when he lets it all out. (SMH)

It has been years on years I wanted to hear I love you from my dad. Don't get me wrong he is an excellent father. He has always given me what I needed and some of what I wanted. I think the only time he was really there for me was when I was in the hospital near death. I just hate it took that for him to really open up with me. Maybe that is just his way of not letting me see his emotions.

The next man was my 1st love. Now I was 14 years old when I met him. I loved and still love him to death. He was everything a girl could ask for. It was one thing though, I could not tear this man away from the streets. Yea I said it. He was only a year older than me and he was out with his friends and do heaven knows what. He had his 1st child when he was 16 and he was still my boyfriend. (SMH) Every time we broke up, he would pop up with another child. That's when I just had enough of the thug life. He later went to jail and served a few years. He said he is done with all that. So far he has been clean, I just don't know how long that is going to last.

Then we have the last man on my list.. I have been seeing him for the last 5 years. I am so confused when it comes to him. One day he is lovie dovie. The next day he is like hell on feet. I know he loves me, he has proven that over time and time again. I just can't get any sense on why it is so hard for him to COMMIT. I am not asking for much when it comes to him. I think we dated for 3 years before we actually had a relationship. Which that only lasted 3 months. He keeps on saying he is scared and he don't want to hurt me. I want to know what in the hell he is so afraid of.

I came to terms with it all. It is what it is.. Just a freakin friendship... LOL

Men, you can't live with them.. You can't live without them.


"I guess I am better off being single and keep the men as friends."

I will never understand your logic in life...

My Thoughts of Today.. Your Reputation..

reputation [repjuˈteiʃən]the opinion which people in general have about a person etc, a persons's abilities etc.

overall quality or character as seen or judged by people in general b: recognition by other people of some characteristic or ability.


We all try and live the best way that we can. We also try to live up to our reputation and expectations when they are all good.

What does a person do if they get a bad rep? By the things that you might have done in your past. I just feel that everyone deserves a second chance. I never quite understood why people are labeled. I have been victim of having a reputation.

On one hand people hold me to some high extent. I have quite a few people who know me at the lower end of the stick to. You know at one point in our lives we all have been young and dumb.

Why is it so hard to clean up your reputation? When one person says something so negative about you. It will stick with you for the rest of your life. Only to have the good things about you get wash down in the drain.

The only thing I can do is keep my head up. Keep on living and make the best of my life. Sticks and stones may break my bones. Nothing you can say will ever hurt me. Life goes on...

My Thoughts of Today... Gay Marriages...

I am not getting it. I was watching the news and California is now banning same sex marriages. I was thinking that Cali was the state that homosexuals was free to roam.

I tell you I don't think it is right to tell someone they can not marry one another. Heck I have heard cases where a father married his daughter and he got to do so.

How can a person tell me I can not marry who I want? If I happen to fall in love with a woman. I feel that I can not live my life without her. The government will tell me I can not put a ring on her finger.

A lot of people say it is not morally right to do such a thing. A marriage should be between woman and man. Well in some people eyes it might be wrong. I also know people who are church goers say it is not right in God's eyes. Well I say God is a forgiven God. He died for our sins. God always know your heart, he knows everything. So when that time comes and you ask the Lord to forgive you . You turn and give your life to God. I don't believe you are going to hell for love. God is love..

I have family members that are gay. I have for a very long time straddle the fence myself. So I don't think no one should tell me that I am not able to join someone that I love. I think that is why I feel I will never get married. I think it is just a piece of paper that tells the government you are together. Why give them all your business?

So I feel like it is wrong for them to give them that right and then take it away. I pray to my sisters and brothers in the LGBT community. Maybe one day you will get your wish...

My Thought of Today...Phonies...

I had to deal with the most stupidest crap today. The people that speak to me everyday and laugh with me. Did not say one word to me today.

This was the day after Obama won President elect. The people on my job did not speak to me. They had no words for me what so ever. They all knew I was part of the Obama campaign. They knew I know that his character was the better choice for America. America is now be in better hands for all Americans.

It goes to show me no matter how much they say they are not racist. They showed their true colors today. When you say stuff that you don't want me to hear and avoid me. It tells me you are just as bad as the people who would call me a nigger.

What make is so bad, is that it was them that put Obama in office. If things were better for America, Obama wouldn't never ran for President. People black and white, and other races, wanted a change.

I can't stand phony people.. Lord bless those who don't know what in the heck is going on.

My Thoughts of Today.. Barack Obama...

After completing both books on Senator Obama and watching various Biographies on him. I am proud to say I love this man. His road has been a compelling one. I think he is not just a Black man in America. He is America.

He is what America is, a melting pot. He have experienced everything from being a child of Mixed raced to a child living in foreign countries.

I know a lot of folks are scared of the fact that he might be the next President of United States of America. There are even people who wants to cause this man harm.

I sincerely don't get it. If all take a look at his background and read the things he wrote. I think you would also see what a great man he is. I made it my point to read his books. I made it my point not to go by what I hear on tv or read in the magazines and papers.

This what gives me the right to know that my decision on November 4th is the right choice.
He will united us as a country. He will build hope for a better tomorrow. He has spend most of his life trying to find out who he was. He did these things cause he wanted social change. He wanted struggling people not to have to go through the heartache and pains they had to deal with. He wants to make sure every American will get their share of the pie.
I know for one, I want that American dream. I think a lot of us that never had it want it too.

My 4 year old God Daughter Aurie put a smile on my face the other day. We where sitting in the den talking about politics and out of the blue she screams.. Go Obama.. I was never sure where she has heard this, cause she is in bed by the time the debates and stuff are going on. So she is so stuck on saying Barack Obama. I asked her who do she want as President.. She said, Barack Obama... I think she evens have a song she made up with just his name.
So on November 4th are you going to make a change? We see the polls that Obama is leading the country. They are just polls, don't think that people don't change. Make sure you go out to vote. Let's bring America together. Let's unite all people with different backgrounds of race, religion, and creed. Let's give hope for a better future.

We sure do need it...

I am Mahoganydymond and I sponsored this message...

My Thoughts of Today... Halloween

Well today is October 31st, 2008.. Today is Halloween... I never been big on this holiday. Yet it seems the older I get I have a great time dressing up in costumes. When I was a kid, I hated it. I didn't like getting in and out the car. I didn't like the ugly makeup and so forth.
This year I am dressing up as 1980's punk/pop rocker. I will be the black Cyndi Lauper... (LOL)..

The thing that I really and truly don't like is giving out candy. I swear some of these kids around here are greedy. You give them one piece of candy and they look at you all funny. Then it is also a dangerous time for kids to be out without their parents. I just have a problem with parents let their kids walk the streets in the dark without them. I frankly don't care if it is just in the neighborhood.

I also enjoy the horror movies that come on television. I am a big horror and suspense movie goer. I am a fan of South Carolina's haunting and ghost stories. What is the funniest thing to everyone else, is the fact I am death scared of The Wizard of Oz. So my friends pick on me about the horror movies.

Be save and have a Happy Halloween....

My Thoughts of Today.. Chicken

I know this is kind of a crazy thought of today. I just have to talk about this. I am sick of CHICKEN.. Since I have been on this diet and trying to live a healthy life, I been eating chicken. I don't eat red meat, heck I barely eat meat at all. So when I do all my meal consists of chicken.

I can't not eat fish in my home, mother is allergic to it. Then she does not eat pork at all.

I know my BFF would go nuts if he knows I am tired of chicken. He is one of the people that I know, including my mother that worships chicken. I am trying to figure out who was the person who first thought to fry the ugly bird.

I am sick of Poultry all together. I am sick of Turkey also. I tried going back to being a vegan and that didn't work out so well. It seems that, well I am not going to tell you the ordeal I was having with being a vegan. It would be to much information (TMI).

So what am I going to do with all the CHICKEN that I have in my freezer? I know I don't plan on eating anymore until after Thanksgiving, I hope.

My thought of Today...Politics

If you are like me, you are so ready for Election Day. Well I decided to do a show tonight on my Blogtalk Radio. We will be talking about the good, bad, and the ugly side of politics.

Who are you supporting? Will we recover from the last 8 years of this mess? Lets talk about it... Moments with Mahogany 8pm EST...

I am back...

I am back on the scene. I am not sure for how long though. I am going to start another budget plan soon. I have to learn how to manage myself. I am the only one in the house working. So I am going to try and go to another form of service. I am still waiting for AOL to reimburse me the money they took from me during a free trial. I haven't figured that out quite yet... So I am going to be in an out of here. I got to find me a part time gig.. Take care..

My Thoughts of Today....My Dreads

My Dreads...



Lord know I love my hair. I waited almost all my life to get locs. It took me when I turn 30 to do so. I got tired of the perms and spending all that money on getting my hair just right. I am at the most happiest state of hair right now.

My only problem is... I am getting so sick and tired of doing my own. I live in a town where people really don't like people with dreads. I get those looks and the asking questions. You know those "Do you wash your hair?" I hate when people ask that too. Of course I wash my hair. I do take care of myself.

Well the town over have people who do locs. They cost me a arm and a leg to do it. I mean I can do my own for free at home. They will charge me between 60 to 80 dollars to just to the new growth. So I am in a state that I have to do my own. :(

My 3rd year anniversary will be coming up soon. I started locing my hair in November of 2005. I had to break down and forget about what people was going to say. I tell you since then I am proud that I made this decision. It has been one of the hightlights of my life...


I love my Dreads..

My Thoughts of Today.. Tough Times

Right now I am in a state that I don't know what to do but leave it to God. I thought that this year would be so much better than last year. Oh boy wasn't I wrong. I am at the point where I feel like I am worth more dead than alive.

I keep saying trouble don't last always. When I say I cut back I have cut back. I am losing hours on my job. They don't want to pay me more. I had to have work done on my mouth. I am living on a costly overdraft as we speak. Well it isn't too much in overdraft, but hell I had to pay my bills. I have even went off have the cable modem. (now that sucks) I had to resort to the free trial of AOL until my fiances get a little better.

I know that I will make it through I have made it through so many times. I have went as far as looking for another job or a part time job. I worked 2 jobs before and I hated it with a passion. So I am looking for at least 3 days a week. I need the extra income coming it. I am the only one working in this house and it is putting a strain on me. My mother gets a retirement check but that is not much. I am basically taking care of her (because of her health).

We does this all leads me. I know pretty soon some more bills going to come up and I am not sure how I am going to pay them.. I hope a change is going to come. I hope it comes soon. Lord be with me..

My Thoughts of Today....My Habits

I have a serious smoking habit. I am not to proud of it. I do love it though. Over the last few days I had to do without.

My dental work has cause me to be sick to my stomach. Do you know how I feel right now? I think many of you feel the same way some of my other friends feel. "You don't need to smoke it is bad for your health."
I tell you that is the saying that I hate the most.
Yes smoking can be bad for your health. It can also cause you to lost money too.
Yes I spend about 50 dollars a week for my habit.

I don't even care how much it cost. I love this habit. It relaxes me when I am at work or at home. I love when the smoke fills my lungs and I get to exhale the smoke. I get this feeling that is so calming.

Yes I might die of heart failure, or something of that nature. There isn't anything in this world that is really healthy for you any way. I mean in the foods you have a chance of dying from eating. You can go out and get hit by a car, bus, or train.

My biggest thing I have a problem with is the fact of these smoking bans. You can go to a bar get drunk and drive home. You just better not light up a cigg cause you will get fined. So I am killing the next person because I am smoking next to them. Yet a person who goes out to drink is may or may not take a person life.

I just don't understand....

Mahoganydymond.net

I couldn't go without my site too long.. I needed my baby back.. So I will be back to blogging over there. I will be doing my thoughts of the day here...

The Candles are all blown out...

It's the day after my Birthday. It wasn't like the usual one that I normally have. No one making a big fuss. I didn't even get a cake this year. My #1 man didn't even call to wish me Happy Birthday. When we talked he still never said anything.

Well the day after I am not even mad. See in the past I would have argued, fussed, and even cried. This really does mean I am growing up..

My Birthday is also a day where my friends from way back call me. I might not talk to them a whole year, but they remember to call me on my birthday. So Quina and Zanya will always be my Birthday Cheerleaders. I do know I forget theirs all the time. Not!!!

The only thing that is bothering me is the fact I can not smoke. I got my Wisdom teeth pulled out. I got it done on Tuesday. I keep hearing about this dry socket. I am death scared of that, but I need a NEWPORT.

My face is swollen. My mouth hurts, and the Loritab's is making me sick. I am up at 3 o clock in the morning. I am hungry.... To curb my Newport craving I am just letting the cigs burn.. hehehee

I know I just need to relax. Hopefully by the end of this week or next, I will have Mahoganydymond.net back into full swing..

I just don't feel right...

I miss my baby.. I blogged here and I normally did my thoughts of the day.. I just miss my Mahoganydymond.net... We just have to cut the buck some where. I was spending unnecessary money. I love to blog and there are tons of blogging communities here. So although I love my own . net... I have to suck it up and let it go...

To be honest I don't want to blog right now..

I had my part 1 of oral surgery done yesterday.. I am so feenin' for a newport and some ribs...

It might just be me....

ItI see now that in the times and trials of my life. The only person that I need is myself. I used to think that it was a pleasure to have friends that care about you. Well in this dark moment, I have none but a few. You go all your life looking to people for comfort. When the time is at your darkest you may have slim to none.

I have been dealing with emotional pain for a very long time. I thought I was strong enough to deal with my issues. I felt like if I just put myself in a place of happy thoughts, I will make it through. O boy was I so wrong. I mean I am in good spirits and I feel that I have over came a lot.

I have been dealing with this tooth pain. Then with the headaches and then the top of stress I am going through. I feel like what can happen next. I don’t think I am ready to see what will happen next.

Last night showed me that I am truly getting older and I got to suck it up. My birthday is on Wednesday but I was celebrating it last night and tonight. I know after I get a few of my teeth cut out I will not be able to enjoy my birthday. My friends knew about it, I told them what time to be there.

A friend of my from North Carolina came down and it was just me and her. A few said they didn’t have the money to come. I had a few that didn’t have no gas in there car, and I had a few that said they would show up later on, I had a few that didn’t want to come because of the other events going on. I also had a few that just didn’t respond all together.

I sucked it up and took it like a Champ. I didn’t worry about them not showing up. Everyone have their reasons and frankly I don’t care about them. Then they wonder why I don’t like talking to them as much as I used to. I no longer have the time to try and keep up with those chickas.

I will not be going to Atlanta this weekend now. My mouth hurts so bad and I know after getting the Wisdom teeth cut out, it is going to be worst. So now I am looking forward to my other trips by the end of the year. I was trying to go back to Atlanta. I also was going to plan a Christmas trip to Alabama, but I can’t get a hold of my Alabama people. So I am going to try to go to Florida. My friend Dee said she will hook me up on a few hotels I might want to stay in.

So I guess we will see how everything turn out in the long run.. I am going to be here and be me. You have to love it or leave it.. I am seeing a lot of people who are leaving it.. Suit yourself.. Be happy… Be blessed…

Me, Myself, and I

I got this from Black Southern Gal

I am not: stupid..
I hear: My friends hawking..
I regret: nothing…

I care: too much about other people….
I always: pray….
I long to: be in a happier place….

I feel alone: most of the time…
I hide: my feeling most of the time…
I drive: my family nuts…

I sing: just to be happy…
I dance: because I love to dance…
I write: all the time…
I breathe: because I am alive…
I play: music to be inspired..

I miss: some of my old family and friends…
I search: for happiness and hope…
I say: what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger..
I feel: lost…

I succeed(ed): by being the person that I am..

I fail(ed): at a few things but it is not making me a failure…
I dream: To be happy, rich, and married…
I sleep: wild in bed…
I wonder: is my life going to get better…
I want: my own house…
I worry: about the state of our economy…
I have: too many things on my mind
I give: my love to those who love me…
I fight: because I am a fighter…
I am: bi-polar…
I can’t: come to grips on certain things in my life…
I stay: at home a lot…
I will: learn not to be so emotional…
I can: be a butt-hole…
I would: like to move back to Charlotte…
I might: need to runaway…
I like: food…
I love: my family…
I smile: because I have too…
I frown: when I don’t want to do something…
I read: all the dern time…
I work: because I need money…

My Thought of Today... A Woman Should Have..

A Woman Should Have.... by Maya Angelou



A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
enough
money within her control to move out
and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
something
perfect to wear if the employer,
or date of her dreams
wants to see her in an hour...


A WOMAN SHOULD
HAVE ...
a youth she's content to leave behind....


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a past juicy
enough that she's looking forward to
retelling it in her
old age....


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
one friend who
always makes her laugh.. and one who lets her cry...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
a good piece
of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her
family...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
eight
matching plates, wine glasses with stems,
and a recipe for
a meal,
that will make her guests feel honored...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
a feeling of
control over her destiny..


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD...
KNOW...
how to fall in love without losing herself..


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to quit
a job,
break up with a lover,
and confront a friend
without;
ruining the friendship...


EVERY WOMAN
SHOULD KNOW...
when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK
AWAY...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that she can't change the length of her calves,
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that her
childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she
would and wouldn't do for love or more...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW....
how to live
alone... even if she doesn't like it...


EVERY
WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..
whom she can trust,
whom she can't,
and why she shouldn't take it personally...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
where to
go...
be it to her best friend's kitchen table..
or a
charming Inn in the woods....
when her soul needs
soothing...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..
What she can and can't accomplish in a day...
a
month...and a year...

(picture by:Garnett Thompkins)

My thought of Today... Faith

My Faith has taught me that God will not put anything on you that you can not bare. Also that if you give it to God he will solve all your problems. As I sit back and been doing a lot of my thinking. This is true, God will make a way for you.

I am by no means a Religious person. Although I am a spiritual person my faith lies on God and Jesus Christ. I have a relationship with him and I feel that at times I do not thank him as much as I should.

He has helped me through it all. I mean through every storm to ever trial. God has helped me see the clearer side of things. He sent people to me that needed to be there at that time. I call those people my Angels.

It was a time when I thought life sucked. I thought nothing that I do was right. I wondered what was my purpose for even being here on earth. I wanted to give up. I wanted to truly end my life. Then one day I was here on the internet and was talking to a friend on here. She called me and laid it to me. She even gave me hope for the future. To this day I still call this woman my Angel.

I am at another dark moment in my life right now. It is not so good. It is stress, money and bills. I also have a short line of dental surgery that I have to have done. Then I have people that I was close to that is not even that close.

So at this point in my life and the fact that I am getting older. I want to build a stronger relationship with God. I have been there, done that, and it is coming around again. So I feel in my heart that if God got me through it before.. I know he is going to get me through it again. All I have to do is have Faith..

Thoughts of the Day... Lazy Co-Workers..

I tried to always be fair and reasonable. I think some of the people I work with is going to make me get ETHNIC. I have been sick for the last few weeks. This is because I am in serious pain and also dealing with life issues. I still show up to work, work my shift, and do it without complaining about the whole thing. I know I need the money and my bills are about extremely past due.

We have this woman at work, I call her Naomi from Momma's Family. I serious she looks just like her and could past for her in a remake. I work for a supermarket so hey that is what Naomi did too. Well Naomi goes home early all the time. If she has one little pain she is out the door. So it leaves me, the Bookkeeper to do her job. It happens about once every week. I don't complain, because the more work I do faster the day goes by.

Today I was suppose to help out up front later on. Well it became until the end of my shift. I was just too busy helping the scan coordinator do her job. It is Wednesday and the prices change today.

You outta saw those dirty looks Naomi was giving me. Naomi even said she should have called out today, if she knew she would be working by herself. We were not busy today, heck who can afford to eat anymore. I gave her a break I was at least that nice.

It was nearing the end of her shift, this heffa leaves 30 minutes early. She walks out the door madder than hell. So I was like get a freaking life. We can not always have our way. So you have some people in this world that wants everything to go their way. They don't want to work but they want the pay. Then never understand why they never have money.
Hell I work my hours but I still don't ever have no money. I am the only one working in the house of two (sometimes 3).

I just don't care for emotional, lazy, whinnying, and attitudes when I am at work. They should be happy just to have a job for peaks sakes.

My Thoughts of Today... South Carolina and Domestic Violence

I have been on this side of the fence once. It took everything I had in me to leave. To a degree a lot of the pain still hasn't left me. At times I still feel like there is no hope for me. I still looking over my shoulder wondering if he would ever pop up again. I have been Mentally, Physical, Emotionally, and Verbal abused by two men in my lifetime.

I was reading the paper yesterday and saw that South Carolina still ranks high in Domestic Violence. The rank was high for women that were killed by men that they know. Black women are killed more than the white women in the State by their partners or men that they know. I think tears were about to fall from my eyes reading that.

"South Carolina ranks at the top of the nation in domestic violence and sixth in the number of women killed by men in domestic homicides, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence."

" South Carolina at 2 with a rate of 2.84 per 100,000"

What is this saying about our State? I also looked into some other things that might have contributed to this.

"4th in unemployment. With a 6.6 percent unemployment rate, only Alaska, Mississippi and Louisiana have more jobless people than South Carolina does."

"2nd in violent crime rate"

"7th in child poverty. The state tied with Texas and Alabama in having a larger percentage of children in poverty (23 percent) than most states. (Kids Count.)"




I not sure if all of this is accurate. I do know I got this from a 2006 and 2007 report. After I had read what was in the newspaper. I think something has to be done. I mean really how many women must die in the hands of men they know...

My Thoughts of Today....The Debates....

These Debates are starting to bore the hell out of me. I am so serious. Last night I was getting really tired of hearing Palin talk. I didn't think she covered the things we wanted to hear. Also her ending sounded very much like it was rehearsed. I was like most of the people I chatted with, I got tired of hearing MAVERICK... I am glad that Bidden busted her butt about that.

I know that I am a Democrat I am a very proud Liberal. So I can be a little bias when I was trying to pay attention to Palin. Her voice irrks the hell out of me. I don't know how it feels to live life like she was describing. Don't get me wrong, she is a good talker. I know she reached a lot of those Mothers in the Suburbs...

Bidden stuck his guns, but he was a little to nice for me. I am used to hearing him hold firm to what he belives. I also wanted this debate to be about them as VP'S they kept going on about Obama and McCain. I think from my stand point Bidden won the debate... I guess to others Palin did. So all in all it was a tie..


Just last Friday Obama won hands down. He kept the straight face, he said what was needed to be said. I am proud of him. Me and my family were also drinking for change.. It was a little game that I saw a lot of people were doing for this first debate. It was every time we heard the word change.. We would take a Tequila shot. Lucky for us they only said it 8 times. LOL

I think a lot of Politicians just lie to get into office. We don't really see the things that they are trying to do for America. I do know that I feel in my heart, Obama is the best canidate.
So I don't care about these dern Debates, they are just to boring for me...

Thoughts of Today... Secrets...

We all have them. You know those things that only you or another person knows. The things that you keep under lock and key. We sure have a fair share of skeletons in our closets too.

I for one hold many secrets under my belt. There are things I have done that I am not proud of and I keep those things to myself. There are things my friends have done or told me that they know I will keep to myself.

Although I am on the net and I pretty much tell most of my life on here. There are things that not even my closes internet friends, family or associates will never know about me.

It is not being about fear of what they think of me. It is pretty much a secret because it isn't any of their business. My friends have told me things that I vowed never to tell. I did just that. I never told one soul about those things.

My biggest problem is the secrets that I have told and it got back to me that they were told. I tell you that is the biggest betrayal ever. I don't understand how someone could break the trust like that. That is when you start to look deep into that friendship and wonder is it worth having.

If you don't have trust you don't have nothing. So what do we do when there are things you got to spill out yet you don't want certain people to know about these things. I have gotten to the point where I just write private blogs. It helps me say what I need to say but others can not view. I do know that some how someone will figure it out.

Then you have those people who their life is one big old secret... How do you figure those types of people out?

My Thoughts of Today... Weight Loss

I've been on this diet since June 30th of this year. I have lost a total of 41lbs. I have been slacking off just a tad. See last week was a busy week for me. I had 3 birthday parties and 1 of them were out of town. So I was only able to work out 1 day last week. We are now on Tuesday and I still haven't been able to work out.

I normally workout once I get off work that is around 5pm or 6pm. Well today I had every intention on working out. Then I had company and I didn't want to be rude with them. Then I had to cook dinner and so forth. So I put it off again.

I am very afraid that I have gained some weight back. I know it wouldn't be that much, but the idea that I haven't worked out. I also did a little over eating the past weekend. While I was in Charlotte North Carolina with family. We all celebrate with food and good food to be exact.

So this is what has been heavy on my mind the last few days. I have came so far with so much will power. Now I am starting to see I am giving up a little hope. My goal was to be 144lbs before my birthday. My birthday on October 15th.. I am weighting in @ 195. So I know those 50lb is not going to come off in 3 weeks. So I am a little depressed...

My thought of Today... Do love Change People...

I know people my say that I changed just a tad since I have been in love. Ive noticed that I don't do certain things that I used to. I don't talk to some of the people that I used to. I still remain the same person.

I know a few people that I deal with on the daily changed, because they are in love. You know you start saying the same things that their partner says. Start hanging with the same people their partner's hang with. They become the similar version of the person they are dating.

In the beginning there was other things they person liked, different from the mate. Then once the hearts and twinkling stars came out. They don't like anything that their partner doesn't like and loves everything their partner's love.

What makes a person do such?

What makes a person lose themselves?

I can say, I might have been so in love with MC. I can say I never changed my ways because of him. I said earlier that I stop doing certain things and talking to certain people. I did that all for the better me. I never once picked up a habit he had. I never say the things he says. I never once wanted to hang out with his friends.

Don't you think some differences can save the relationship?

My thoughts of Today... If I had children...

I had an debate with MC last night. It is starting to concern me. We have been together for years now. If we take our relationship future, I want to be able to adopt or try to have children.

I am a firm believer that a mother (if possible) should stay home with the child until the child turn at least 2years old. I think that is the perfect time to send a child off to daycare. He believe 6months is enough time. He thinks that way the child will get an early start to becoming a genius. He said that the child will be able to talk, walk, and react well with others. He feels that if the child stays with the mother any longer than 6months the child is going to be spoiled and not be able to interact with other people as well. Also being in a household needs to have two incomes to keep it running.

My mother took a year off with me. I think I was a very good child and I turned out to be pretty smart. I might not apply myself but that is my choice.

I feel that a child needs their parents. I believe that me being home with my child we will have a better bonding. I also know that kids that go to daycare to early get sick a lot.
I want my child to be old enough to tell me if someone is doing something bad to them. See I don't have that much trust in anyone.

I think a child that is loved and the parents talk to them they will learn just as quick. I just don't see myself leaving my child that early on in his or hers life. I feel like if it is a money issue, I will make a way just to be home with my child.

What do you all think?