30 Days of Thanks... My Friends who set me straight..

I know that I have been slacking a little..Life I tell you will hit you all kind of ways....
Well through my storms I have always had that one person that hears it all.. It is the ones that no matter where we are in life.. When our most life troubles hit us.. They are right there to keep me in order..

Bestest:

"Commonly known as a male who shows how much he cares about you, He's sweet and kind and a gentlemen. He's cute, and handsome and funny. He's intelligent active and all around an Amazing guy. He can be found as your bestfriend, or your greatest friend who would do anything for you."

Even though me and him have our bouts.. Even though I feel like sometimes I can strangle him.. (not really) This man is my everything.. He won't let me have my way.. I can be super mad at him, then once he call I forget why I am even mad at him.. I am still waiting on the LORD .. hehehe  Like he said to make our paths connect on another level. Yet he has been that friend that knows what I need when I need it.. When I am down, he cheers me up.. He tells me what I need to hear even when I don't want to hear it. 

sisterhood:

"A bond between two or more girls, not always related by blood. They always tell the truth, honor each other, and love each other like sisters. "

My Diva Lord knows when to put people in the right place at the right time.. She is my amazing Diva... We are synced on some many levels.. Her monthly is mine.. When she feels down, I am down... When we need to hit the road and turn up..  We do it.. I am glad that she is my friend.. Now we dont see much of each other as we once was.. I do know I can always pick up the phone and it brings a smile to my face.. She keeps me laughing.. She is my rock and my fam... 

A few others like Moni, Ambi, Kween, Kim,and Queen.. Y'all have been some supportive people in my life.. I thank you all.. I know that it seems that I have been so distant.. Not on purpose.. I am trying to grow up and not rely on others... I guess you can say.. I am trying to find myself..

Day 12.... Baby Baby Baby

For years I always wanted a child.. I wanted a BABY of my own.. I see a baby and I just get all goo goo gaga over them.. Especially if they look like they would be a child of mine. I believe that God has his own plans for me.. After my last miscarriage the Doctor said that I will never be able to carry a child to full term. It was so heartbreaking to me. I accepted the fact that I will never have a BABY. So I just admire those who do.. 

Day 12.. A day I wish I can Take Back....

I saw this woman around Facebook.. We had some mutual friends.. Better yet I had seen her around my sister from time to time.. 

I was started getting poked a few days before I saw the red light on top of the people heads...  It took me a few days but I was like what the hell.. I got people on here that I am not friends with...  So I accepted.. GOT DAMN GOSH!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY?  If I knew what I know now.. I wouldn't never  accepted that damn request...

I started get inbox notes.. I was like this woman is pretty cool.. I wasn't looking for anything.. I was just chilling and I was finally at my happy place in the single life.. So I had no worries...
We started hanging out.. I was having a great time.. One day I was asked to date her. I was kinda stand offish because for one SHE WASN'T MY TYPE.. I did like her as a person though.

I weighted all my options and I even chatted with my sister... Sis told me to be careful because she has a rep for not committing.. So I did.. But as time went on.. Things got deeper.. I felt that I was in the best relationship EVER.. I was being taken cared of.. I was being paid attention too.. I felt truly adorn..

It got too be so much I even told my mother about my relationship.. I stopped hanging around people I thought were my friends because of her.. *they didn't like the fact*.. I GAVE UP EVERYTHING for this woman.
Time passed and it was a new year.. Things started changing.. Her attitude and gratitude started changing.. Come to find out.. She went back to her ex.. (i dont think she ever stopped)... I was hurt, shaken, and devastated by her actions.. I settled, I gave up everything, and I told my secrets.. For what..? I blindsided love affair..

It is not 1 year since we broke up and I still am having issues with her.. I have tried to let go.. I have even went as far as letting her woman know what she has done to me.. It's like she won't let me be.. I did try just being her friend.. Then she started acting like we were still together.. Now I am trying to move on with my life..
So this is a day I wish I could take back.. That stupid friend request and all..