Things been going fairly well.. I have my days and some are better than others.. I am starting to get tired of people telling me how I should be feeling. No one walks in my shoes.. My life is a learning process and I have to learn, ya know..
Anyhoo I had to start treating folks they way they treat me. I know I might sometimes come off as a needy attention seeker..LOL I just feel that I am important.. I also I sometimes suck at being a friend. I am just one who has to shut herself off sometimes before I flip..That is my coping ritual... It's never personal..
I went out of town weekend from last.. I had a wonderful time. I came back with a clear head.. I really needed that freeing experience.. I needed to BREAK free.. I also had to show a certain someone, you have no control over me even though you think you do...
I am me! I am going to do me...
Well coming back with that clear head.. A that two week vacation I took from work.. I limited access to my life. I stop updating my facebook every minute (lol) I set my profile to friends only.. I also added some people to a can't trust list so they can't see some of my post..
I don't be in a hurry to answer text or phone calls. I don't cook the foods that person likes.. I even went as far just not being fucking available.. Yesterday made 2 years since she broke my heart.. That was just 2 years to damn long to be in mourning over her.
I still hurt something seriously, but I can not stop my life.. I know at times I said I had enough.. Then come back falling for the shyt.. I am truly tired this time.. Heck, I am tired of dealing with it.. I thought that maybe being friends would be ok. I just had to say in order for me not to resent you, I can't deal with you..
So I am now on that motto.. That Golden Rule.. Treat others as they treat you... I am on it!
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