My Thoughts of Today... Being Patient

I been here thinking.. I have been up and down with the love of my life. I have always been patient with him.

My past with him has been so so. I do know that even at the worst of times I still loved him. I promise him I would practice being even more patient.

He is one that hasn't had many women in his life. He was sorta of a shelter and shy boy growing up. He witness the relationship between his mother and father not be so good. So sometimes I think it is a deeper issue as to why a relationship is so hard for him. His father wasn't always around and when he was he wasn't there for his kids. Yet the love his mother had for his father never changed. If he did wrong she still was there for the man.

I kinda feel like his mother in some way. I wouldn't have put up with the things his father did. I do know my love for him is even stronger as we aren't together at this moment. I have learned in my past, that a man isn't always ready when the woman is. You can not force it just let it flow into place.

I have over the last 5 years been letting things fall into place. I think today was one of the days that my patience has paid off. It hasn't gotten the results that I wanted. It is still shows some progress. Today I heard the words that I been wanting to hear for the longest... Tracy, I am happy to have you in my life... It was weird and I had to wait for a second to let it all soak in.

The most ironic thing was those words was told to me by his mother in a dream last night. I had a dream that me and him got into it at his mother's house. She said, You better stop acting like that. She is the best thing that ever happened to you. You outta be happy she is still with you. So when he told me this I was so dumbfounded.

I am still being patient and I am not jumping back into to something with him. I am going to wait and see how things pan out. He is and I feel will always be the love of my life. Have you just ever found someone that you can feel totally comfortable with? I have that with him, even if we aren't in a relationship..

I am letting things fall into place. I was blessed when God gave me the gift of patience. Good things always come to those who wait.. I am willing too...