It is almost that time.. I am about to head back to work after having 2 months off.. It is so BITTERSWEET cause I know, the same crap will be going on..  I needed this break… I hate that it was because of Surgery though.. Hey who wouldn’t want to take 2 months off in the summer?  I have to get back on the grind though. I can no longer hate work.  I have to wake up every day with positive thoughts.  I have to learn how to like people. Even though there are so many walking around with the lack of common sense.

This recovery time off took me through some CHANGES I tell you.. All that time sitting around thinking of things and people I’ve lost. Whew, it was killing a sister.. I think I cried more these few months than I did when I was a child. Seriously, I felt like I had NO ONE.  People always tell me. Call me… I am not the type of people that likes to call people. I don’t like the phone to much.  Of course if I haven’t talk to you in a while I might spend a few minutes talking.  I don’t think I like texting either..  Well I don’t like the shorthand stuff.  HEHEHE!!  Sometimes I try and figure out what they are saying.

I want to start back going out doing things. I am a single woman with no children.  I got to stop this hermit mess.. Yes, people are going to hurt me.   I know that I am hurting myself also. I try to avoid situations.  I don’t know where and when I got this phobia. I used to be a go out mingle type of woman.  Hey, this is how I know a lot of people.  I might not be in their circle, but I know a quite few.

Not too long ago my Diva (cousin/friend) was talking about how she misses having a Sisterhood.. They type like Girlfriends, Single Ladies, Sex in the City.  The only time I had that type of friendship was when I was in High School.  No, wait I take that back… It was when I had my friends Tessa and Dee..  Those girls were my rock, my sunshine, and my fun times. They weren’t from here but they had moved up here cause of one of their family members.  I trusted those women with my life.  We went out together. If we didn’t go out we would hang out we would hang at the house with drinks, food, and movies.  I told Dee the other day that I miss her so much via Facebook.  She agreed.  I told her it is so hard to find a trustworthy friend here.   She agreed to that too. So I plan on taking trips down there.   I miss them entirely too much.  Plus I she has had more children and I haven’t got to meet them.  She is back in school and it is hard for them to make it up here.  Tessa included.  I have seen her though I think the last time I saw her was about 5 years ago or a little bit more.  I haven’t seen Dee since 2000.

I know that I am not totally over my ending with ex S.O.S. I do miss being in a relationship.  I think it is so much simpler than trying to date numerous people.  I do like dating, but now a days it is so hard to find a person to date.  I mean they don’t want to take you anywhere. Some say they don’t have the money to do this and that.. I do know the next person I date. They will not know that I know how to cook.  It seems once they find out. They stop wanting to take me out. It is like; you know how to cook this and that. So why is it a need to go out?  NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Not this time buddy.  I want to experience so much more now. Life is so short. I am not promised tomorrow.   I hated even go near to finishing what I want to do before I am 40. Oh well.. I might not get to anyway…