This just wasn't the month for me... I am so lost... I don't really know how to get my happy back... I'm trying.. Lord knows I am trying my DAMN-EST to get it back... There has been NO LUCK for me.. I keep getting hit in the head... I surely don't know where to turn... So I came here to write out my frustrations... I tend to do that..
It started off my Grandmother dying... Which it was during the time of my vacation... So just say my mourning took place while I was on vacation.. Enjoyed my time off but I miss my grandmother... I still haven't got over that...
Then the one person I finally felt I could connect with start having trouble.. So we ended the relationship that I lost everything to have... I am still not over it... It seems not to even phase her.. She has been coming around but it isn't the same. I can't even talk about my feelings. I think that is the part that hurts the most. She goes to say.. My family comes 1st... So yea.. Can't argue with that...
Then this week I took ill.. So I been sick all week.. I haven't felt good in awhile but had so much going on.. I ignored it and try to play that I was ok... Well it caught up with me... I am doing better but not my best...
Then just yesterday I got a call from my Aunt.. My uncle died... He died a month later after my grandmother (his sister)... I can't take much more of this..
I spent most of my day crying... I want my LIFE back... I just don't know how to go about picking up the pieces...
4 comments:
Aww...I am so sorry to hear that. Perhaps both of you need time. This person has to understand you need your time to grieve. The answer is just to take one step and a time, breathe one breath at a time...and celebrate each one. It's okay to not know, to be numb, to grieve..only you know the proper timetable for you in order to get back on track. I'm around if you need me....(((hugs)))
I'm so sorry to hear about all the things going on right now :( I come to Easley a couple times a month, I will have to come get you so we can go have lunch. I had an issue with my last relationship also, ended up back with C cause it seems the saying the "grass is not greener on the other side" is too true! I'm reading from the top-down so I'm not sure what happened with yours but I'm sad to hear it didn't work out :(
I can not say anything more than your friend stated above. Please take the time to grieve and don't worry, love has not abandoned you.
@moni... Yea I guess we did need this time of space... It stills hurts cause it really happened so suddenly... All in a few weeks... I miss her... I miss our time together... I think I am ok now with the death of my uncle and my grandmother... Cause they lived great and long lives... It just it was too much too soon...
@Toshi... Thanks... I hope that things will work out with us... I love her... I miss her... Yet I will still keep moving... Maybe it wasn't our time together... I know love hasn't abandon me because I still have love in my heart... Let me know I am always around...
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