Wow.. How can I really put this all into words... I must have changed a lot... I guess I am becoming a better person... I never knew just how strong I really was until now... If you all have been one of my long time readers.. You know I don't do to well in relationships.. AT ALL!!!!!!
When I love... I LOVE hard.. I become some what selfish... I want all the time and attention... I used to feel like they were up to something if they didn't call or want to spend all their free time with me.. Yea I am also a smothered lover... ( I am still like that in ways) I just have grown to know that the WORLD DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND ME....
In the last few weeks... Love has changed me... It has also brought forth some challenges... 1st off.. I did loose my grandmother on the 29th of February... It was hard pill to swallow.. I am just glad she doesn't have to suffer anymore. She was having such a hard time.. She is now with God... So she is doing just fine now..
Once again it seems that me and my S.O.S haven't been spending much time together.. Work and some family matters has taken her time away from me. It hurts inside. It makes me feel like not even my feeling matter.. (this is when my issues begin).. I am although being the supportive girlfriend.. I am putting aside my feelings and emotional baggage.. Why am I doing this? It's cause I love her... It's funny.. It used to be a time I would have pitch a flying bytch... I used to be so demanding in a relationship... *i guess that's why none of them lasted* ... So this is a challenge for me.. More and More I am becoming a better person.. Not just for myself but for the person I am with. I just hate these challenges are being tested so freaking close together.. hehehe..
I am also on vacation that what took the cake.. NOT ONE DAY did I get to do anything I wanted to do... I just sat in the house.. I wrote in my journal.. I played my FB games. So yea this has been a relaxing vacation (just a tad)... I can't believe it but I truly miss work... LOL
2 comments:
(((hugs)))
Yeah, losing someone close brings about unseen changes all the way around. I'm sorry you lost your grandmother. (((HUG)))
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